Finishing Up

I can't believe that we are completing our final high school projects. It is by far the strangest feeling. I have 6 more days of being 17 and I have such mixed emotions about it. I don't feel like I ever stopped being the little girl that was excited to grow up and play with the big kids. I'm afraid that my mentality of wanting to grow up too fast made me miss out on some things. I feel like I wasted a lot of time trying to be older and do things that older people do before the time was right. I'm sad that I'll never have a chance to go back and do it over. To me that's one of the weirdest things about living: the idea that everything only happens once. We hear it everyday but how many times have we actually listened to what that means? I'm hoping that when I get to college next year (SANTA CRUZ!!!) that I will be more open to being young and just trying to live. I don't want to feel like I've wasted anymore time. On the other hand, I'm very excited to leave for college. I finally decided on Santa Cruz and I'm really happy with my decision. The idea that I will no longer be living with my Mom is a very bittersweet thing. I'm really nervous about essentially starting over and I just hope that I will adjust quickly and do really well :)!